this evening i went to a concert at school. afterwards my friend said i should blog about it(undoubtedly without a shred of confidence that I actually, y'know, would) but I literally don't know what else to be doing right now. hello.
I should warn you to expect incoherency, but if you've read anything at all here, and you're for whatever reason still here, then i assume you understand and accept it. you're a stronger person than i. well done.
I don't know what I actually thought about the ordeal. This much is certain:
1.) Bar stools should NOT be used in the context of music videos or performances ever. EVER. I don't really see why you'd willingly lower yourself to the standard of an early-2000s British boyband, but there you go. I don't really understand why the people on stage willingly lower themselves to the standards I saw tonight so I guess we're just very different people. These props were used I think three times tonight I think? One more time and i would've been personally responsible for removing them mid-song, I guarantee you. stop standing up and sitting down whenever the key changes.
2.) I don't recommend sitting front row for anything. Ametuers or professionals, it makes no difference. It'll just disappoint you. Everyone is more attractive and interesting and has more stage presence when you can only just make out what they look like, from fifty feet away, and you're squinting to see more. Five feet away and every flaw is on show!
3.) The dancing in these things has always bothered me. At the risk of going all Tumblr Justice Blogger on all of you, it all seems strangely objectifying...except male or female, I can never really properly identify who is being objectified... or how? I mean if people wanna dance a certain way it's up to them and i may find something objectifying (and yes, some of it is, unequivicocally so) but I honestly don't care if they don't find or objectifying or wanna be seen a cetain way. I'm mostly just interested in my own inability to locate what bothers me! I guess there's the costumes or something? Whatever! NOT PUSHING MY STANDARDS ON ANYONE GUYS PLEASE UNDERSTAND ME. It's just...interesting I guess. sorry it's too late to start forming opinions i won't regret.
4.) The theme was one hit wonders. I think this is my favorite one hit wonder if only because it accurately demonstrates why northern English accents don't work in pop music. While we're on the subject, I think we should all make an effort to propel this to full One Hit Wonder status. To be fair, this does have more than eight million views more since I last watched it. We're getting there.
5.) Amy Winehouse was not a one hit wonder I mean c'mon.
6.) There was an abundance of clunky piano chords. STEP AWAY FROM THE INSTRUMENT. please. it wasn't made for that. it's abuse. please step away slowly now just please stop.
7.) There are few things more deeply confusing to me than the obsession so many people have at the moment with the 80s. I...don't get it. What the hell was good about the 80s? I wanted to get super deep into this problem so i did a super elaborate investigation about it. (In other words, I went to find my mom and ask her. Her response: nothing was good). I'm inclined to agree. I mean...Reagan? Thatcher? Neon clothes? U2? Bad pop music? I always think big business too. I don't know. It's just all so icky, especially when sandwiched between the decades of total awesomeness that were the 70s and the 90s. I mean...you'd take big hair and lime green tanktops and duran duran over a.) being a total punk or flower child and listening to X Ray Spex and stuff (please ignore the disco) or b.) being all apathetic and shit and watching MTV and listening to smashing pumpkins? WHAT WORLD ARE YOU LIVING ON.
8.) Speaking of Thatcher, that is the middle name of our new principle. His name is so upper class English it's pretty terrifying.
9.) If you're the director of the music stuff at a school and to outsiders you already give off an air of weird authoritarianism(but in a really effeminate way?) smugness i personally just think giving us an unscheduled performance of your own as a treat makes you look silly. people could disagree with me so hard on this. my two cents.
10.) Don't perform Kung Fu Fighting. Just don't. It just won't go well. It won't. Please trust me.
11.) Oh god i'm such a judgemental dick but as it's my blog and it's late i'm not gonna limit myself too much when I say please do not willingly become a drama kid or associate yourself with drama kids enough that there's even the slightest risk you will become sorta like them. I'm sure...I mean, statistically some of them have gotta be pretty cool people right? It's just...it's gotta be possible. I don't mean people who just do the music stuff, I mean the people who just embody the whole song and dance of it all. Some of them have got to be okay. AND YET. i'm sorry i'm sure you're all lovely and i know stuff like this is your Thing not mine and seriously well done for performing and all that but please sometimes you act hyper and you ignore other people around you and sometimes you act kinda awful and sometimes you have facades that are like crystal clear and i'm sorry i'm so so sorry you just sort of exhaust me. i'm sorry.
12.) The ultimate lesson of the night: you should not perform 1985. I'm sorry. It's just...there was tinny music with no bass. There were oversized lopsided yellow tank tops. There were orange tights. there were legwarmers. there was bad miming. there was no irony. there was...a total lack of cohesion or competency in dancing or singing. there were malfunctioning microphones. there was fake enthusiasm. I'm sorry. Well done for performing. I'm not saying it's...awful? I'm just saying i've seen Holocaust documentaries that were less personally depressing to me. I'm sorry.
I'm not saying I had a bad time! It was fun for what it was worth. It really was! I'm being overly critical and stuff. PERFORMING TAKES SO MUCH BRAVERY etc etc etc.
Another day when i'm more conscious and stuff i'll talk about how it was just my birthday and i'm 16 and stuff but that time is not now. See, I blogged! Goodnight everyone.
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